The movie The Princess Bride (1987) is considered a cult classic, and in my biased opinion, is easily one of the best movies ever. To sum up the movie, for those of you who are living under a rock and haven’t watched it yet; “In this enchantingly cracked fairy tale, the beautiful Princess Buttercup and the dashing Westley must overcome staggering odds to find happiness amid six-fingered swordsmen, murderous princes, Sicilians, and rodents of unusual size. But even death can’t stop these true lovebirds from triumphing” (letterboxd).
Westley, one of the main characters, is undoubtedly extremely handsome but also very dedicated to Buttercup, as I’ll discuss later on. At the start of the film, we learn he lives on a farm that Buttercup’s family owns as a farmhand. He doesn’t talk much, only responding to Buttercup’s teasing, demanding requests with his iconic, timeless line “As you wish”. Obviously, this annoys Buttercup who wants more of a reaction from him, hence her relentless tormenting. After a horse ride, she requests that he shine her saddle and then fill buckets with water. Of course, being the gentleman and dream man he is, Westley does exactly that. Now, even though it took Buttercup long enough to realise he’s literally the boyfriend every woman wants, she realises eventually that she’s actually in love with him. The next day comes, and, like a true film woman, she requests he come closer to her knowing he’ll comply, then they kiss and proclaim their undying love for each other. Unfortunately, Westley is broke but still enamoured by Buttercup and wishes to marry her, and sets out for money so they can get married.
However, in true movie fashion, Westley’s ship is captured by the Dread Pirate Roberts (DPR) and, you guessed it, he ‘dies’. For the next few years, like any self-respecting woman, she goes into solitude and refuses to ever love another man again (the d is fire). Again, however, because this is a movie, Westley is actually spared by DPR because he’s so super in love with Buttercup and wants to get married to her, so instead Westley becomes his valet and is trained by him so he can eventually become DPR himself — there’s this whole thing that DPR isn’t actually DPR and the real one has been retired for a while because he was so rich already.
Anyway, long story short with Westley (now known as Roberts) he follows Buttercup’s ship because she’s been captured. The said capturers; Fezzik, Vizzini, and Inigo Montoya, hurry to lose him because they don’t want to lose Buttercup. They scale a rock wall, and Vizzini cuts the rope once he reaches the top, hoping that their pursuer will plummet to his death. Westley quickly grabbed at some rocks that were jutting out from the cliff side, preventing his fall because not only is he emotionally a good boyfriend, but it also REALLY fit. Who she believes to be the Dread Pirate Roberts who killed Wesley, is pushed down a hill by her; and as he tumbles to the ground, he calls out “As you wish” because he’s a bit dramatic like that, and then she’s like “omg that’s my one true love” and rolls down after him. Then they are reunited and happy, they then have to go through the fire swamp, home to big ugly rats, fire that shoots from the ground, and quicksand patches.
I won’t go through the entire plot, but all this really shows how Westley is honestly such a good husband. Like, he literally becomes a feared pirate, finds Buttercup’s captors, pursues them, and survives a bunch of stuff thrown at him, just to get her back. Like, is that too much to ask for in this day and age? He ends up getting tortured and STILL somehow saves her from the king who wants to marry her. Watching this at a very young age really taught me to raise my standards when it comes to men, and to not settle for anything less than Westley. They end up sharing a super dream-worthy romantic kiss. According to the internet, these are the most desirable traits a man can have: Confidence, Respectfulness, Sense of Humor, Intelligence, Ambition, Kindness and Empathy, Communication Skills, Honesty and Integrity, Physical Fitness, and Open-mindedness. Westley literally has all of these, which further proves my point that he is a VERY eligible bachelor. I wish men were real.